Thursday, March 3, 2011

No, This Is Not The Photo

I promise. It's coming soon. If I can remember to have Matt take it after Alice and I get home from her hair appointment tonight. This post is about something else.

When I was in high school, I dated this boy. He was my first, well, everything. Until I fell in love with my husband, I don't think I have ever loved any male as much as I loved him. (Yes Matt, I love you more. No doubt there sweetie) This boy used to tell me a quote that he lived by. One that coincidentally (or not) has permeated its way into my life. From that moment, I saw it everywhere.

If you love something, let it go. If it comes back, it's yours. If not, it never was.

I didn't get it until I was older however. Why would I let something go if I loved it? Why not hold on to it? How could something I loved have never been mine in the first place?

I'm almost 29 now (34 days), and it makes complete sense to me. To bad I couldn't see it then. The thing is, if you love someone, you want what's best for them. Even if that's not you. As much as that might hurt. So you are willing to open yourself up to the pain, just for that person to be happy. If that's not love, what is?

The hope is that this person realizes that you love them enough to allow that. Allow isn't really the right word. That you will open yourself to that might be better. And by realizing that you are willing to hurt for them to be happy, they will realize you are where they want to be.

Life doesn't always work that way, as we teenage angst driven girls found out. We often wound up with broken hearts. But at 28 years old, I realize that we needed that. To learn. To grow. To find true love.

I hope that boy is happy. And I wish him the best. I thank him for introducing me to that quote. To love. Because if it weren't for him, I wouldn't know love to give my husband, I wouldn't understand how much love my husband has for me. (now, just don't expect Matt to give teenage boy any thanks...)

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