Sunday, November 14, 2010

Dear Waitress Last Night

Let me explain to you why we left you only 10% (If your manager hasn't let you know by now. We informed him as well)

First, it took you 5 minutes to come get our drink orders. We chalked this up to the fact that the place was busy. While waiting, we listened to the drunk ass rednecks beside us yelling "Fuck you! I'm gonna kick ur ass!" Isn't there a NC law about cutting off patrons that are obviously intoxicated?

Finally you came and got our drink orders... Going to bring them to us? We're waiting. For that matter, our salad and bread would be good too.

Oh! Yay! Drinks! But you're not our server? Oh, there she is. Hugging and talking to her friends. Did she just... sit down?

Appetizer? Mmm... Friend mushrooms. Love them. You're not our waitress either, but you walked off before we could get a side of ranch. Husband can't do the sauce you guys bring alone. Heartburn. Waitress, where are you? Back at the table of your friends? Oh, look at that. They have their salad, bread, drinks, and appetizers. Wait, didn't they get here 15 minutes after us?

Oh, sorry you heard us asking another server for bread and the ranch. Oops. You were going to have someone get the bread for us? Might want to talk to them, they seem to be slacking.

Oh look! There's the bread! And our salads. Guess that person you asked to do your job isn't working out for you, since you brought them yourselves. And back to your friends!

Oh... The steaks look delicious. I feel sorry for the person bringing them. She got a bit confused. But I can understand as she's not our server either. I know that boys usually like their steak pinker than girls, but I promise, the medium rare is mine. He's the medium. Scouts honor! No, I never was a scout, but you get it. Thanks for my steak!

Would be nice to get some more rolls.... Oh look, you're back with your friends. You know, maybe if you didn't sit and talk with them so much, you might have time to... Oh never mind!

Damn. Never saw you again! We finished dinner, but now we don't need the rolls. Check please? Hell no I don't want desert. I have no fucking clue how long it will take for me to get it.

1 comment:

Cara said...

Your a better person than me, I would have left her no tip. Sorry you had sucky service.