Friday, September 3, 2010

No Vampires At Walmart Today. Mildly Disapointed.

I'm on Chapter 13 of Meg Cabots newest book, Insatiable. The book is about Meena Harper (vaguely familiar?), a woman who hates vampire story lines, but is forced to write them for the soap opera she is working on. The book so far has gotten in a few hilarious jabs at the whole Twilight obsession some people seem to have (*whistles as I look around the room. Not me. No... NEVER me!) In this version of vampire lore, Vampires burn in direct sunlight, need blood to live, and are still a secret.

There are also vampire hunters, a secret sect of the Vatican. You don't even have to be a Christian to work for them, just have the ability to kill anything with sharp fangs. Of course, there is also an uber-sexy vampire, who we all know Meena will wind up falling in love with. It wouldn't be Vampire porn otherwise. Oh, you guessed it. The main vampire hunter? He's gunning for him. Oh Noes!

What had me cracking up last night was during a part that the hunter narrates. He's trying to get to Uber-sexy vamp, by tracking down a vampire who is sucking the blood of a pretty Walmart employee. Well, formerly pretty. Apparently the blood loss is taking it's toll on her. Vamp Hunter explains to the audience (us) that for some reason, vampire prefer trolling Walmart parking lots, over Target. He thinks because Target has better security cameras. Vamp Hunter himself prefers Target. All I could think was "I need to tell the girls on the BHB!"

Meg Cabot is also the writer of The Princess Diaries, one of my secret loves. I started reading it years ago, and had to find out how Princess Mia turned out, even though she didn't finish the series until I was 27. She actually writes quite a few well known series, and there is irony over the fact that she is one of my daughters favorite authors as well. Allie Finkles Rules For Girls, a great series for all girls.

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