Monday, November 16, 2009

I am worried *(TMI: Ladies issues)

I have been having personal female issues for years. Ever since I was younger. First I had polyps on my ovaries, but they went away on their own. I was 16. Not long after that, I started having really painful periods. They hurt before, but this was a new kind of pain, that would keep me out of school it hurt so bad. A doctor told me he didn't think I would be able to have children, and that he thought I had early stage endometriosis.

In foster care, they tend to forget to take you back to the doctor. So it was never confirmed. And as just a few short years later, I gave birth to my first daughter, I think he was wrong. After that though, my painful periods went away. From having 8 day long, heavy, painful periods, to 3 days, pretty light.

I got pregnant with Emily a little while later, and all was fine. Then I started bleeding and didn't stop. For almost 3 months straight. Going on different birth control evened it out again, but the polyps came back, they started shrinking and disappearing, but the doctor kept me off of birth control to see what the problem was. About this time, I had to leave my job as I no longer had a sitter I could afford for the children, and lost my insurance. I haven't been back to the doctor since September 2008.

In the past year, I have missed months, had two periods in a month, month long periods... I don't know what's wrong with me and it scares me. Yes, I know I need to go back to the doctor, but trying to find an insurance that will accept me with out causing us to lose our house is nearly impossible. And I don't know what to do.

And I feel alone in it. It's not like Matt doesn't care, he just doesn't think about, where as I am worried about it all the time. You wonder, "what will it be today? Spotting? Light? Or massacre?" I mean some days, I go to the bathroom, and when I wipe, there is a blood clot, but NOTHING ELSE HAPPENS. No other blood, nor pain. And everyone else is going on their merry ole' way, while you are scared there is something seriously wrong. And wondering "why me"?

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

I know the lonely scared feeling of worrying about health issues.

Are you insured now that you're married? If so, please get to the doctor and demand some answers. You shouldn't have to spend your life worrying. :(

Angel said...

Do you have a health clinic that you could go to near you? If so, if I were you I would ask them to run some blood tests and specifically look at your insulin levels.
Your symptoms sound a lot like what I went through for a very long time. I even had one doc suggesting a hysterectomy and referred me to an OB for a surgical consult. Thankfully she checked my insulin levels and determined I have insulin resistance. I am now on meds, but my periods are normal and I feel A LOT better.